How Not To Be A Supermodel

It’s the second you’ve all been ready for*: my first ever e-book, How Not To Be A Supermodel, is accessible for pre-order! Here!

An precise e-book that it is possible for you to to carry in your palms. Or, if you happen to desire my dulcet tones, hearken to along with your ears. You’ve cherished my revealing life updates, over time, and also you’ve diligently learn via my farcical tales of woe (bear in mind after I virtually by accident penetrated myself with a shower faucet?): now it’s time to let me take you all the best way again to 2001, after I was a mere slip of a factor, leaving my legislation diploma to grow to be an immediately wealthy and well-known supermodel.

You possibly can name How Not To Be A Supermodel a memoir, as a result of I wrote it about myself and my recollections and the experiences I had as a style mannequin within the noughties, however my God that makes it sound very severe. “Memoir” makes it sound as if I wrote my e-book within the 1800s. Within the drawing room, while mom did her needlepoint and Eliza practised on the pianoforte.

And let me ask you this: would a memoir, to your thoughts, embrace a narrative about by accident happening a luxurious five-day vacation with a person you didn’t know? Would a memoir usually have a chapter referred to as Physique Like a Turgid Penis? Or – maintain on a second whereas I rustle via my notes – I’m Drunk and I’m Not Carrying Knickers? No it could not.

So sure, I wrote it about me and sure, it’s set prior to now, however don’t make the error of considering that any painful soul-searching went into this e-book. Let’s not get the unsuitable finish of the stick, right here. I didn’t write it while sobbing periodically right into a starched linen kerchief, dabbing my eyes when it obtained to the insufferable bits: this can be a rip-roaring riot of a journey via a decade of the inconceivable eventualities and surprising occasions that life as a non-supermodel threw up, and it’s chaotic and blundering and humorous and continuously ridiculous.

Pre-order How Not To Be A Supermodel

OK, there are poignant moments. After all there are. The truth is I used to be particularly instructed, after I obtained the e-book deal, that I needed to embrace the bits that might create one thing of a speaking level. (As if me inadvertently turning into concerned in an impromptu intercourse present or virtually falling into shark-infested waters wasn’t sufficient of a speaking level.) And so sure, I’ve put within the troublesome bits in addition to the entire elements that can probably have you ever spitting out your espresso and embarrassing your self on public transport.

However largely this can be a snort-inducing, extremely correct** account of all of the methods through which I didn’t grow to be a supermodel. My obvious bodily shortcomings, my persona defects and my spectacular means to draw chaos and catastrophe in virtually any state of affairs.

You’ll be able to pre-order How Not To Be A Supermodel now – the discharge date is twenty ninth August. It has already been heralded as THE ONLY BOOK YOU NEED TO READ THIS YEAR!*** and so I believe it’s a reasonably protected wager that you just’ll find it irresistible. Pre-orders actually matter, apparently, and so if you happen to solely ever click on on one hyperlink I put up then please make it this one. I’ll be endlessly in your debt.

Pre-order your copy of How Not To Be A Supermodel here

I’ll be again with extra posts concerning the e-book and concerning the technique of writing it as a result of it has truthfully been one of the best, most satisfying factor I’ve ever accomplished in my grownup life. For those who’ve adopted me for some time then you definately’ll know that writing was what I had began to do on the finish of my modelling profession; running a blog was a really completely satisfied accident that took off into one thing nice and I’ve a superb and rewarding profession in social media due to it, however I’ve been hounding a e-book deal for a really very long time****. It’s a correct “full circle” second for me.